It is just coming up for 8:30 and routine is slowly coming back. Ah, yes, routine .. I remember you, it has been a while but I never forgot about you! I longed for you but secretly enjoyed not having you in my life for the first few mornings but it is good to have you back!
Pulling the covers back and stepping into my slippers at 6:30 felt good. Switching on the shower for Nick and putting the heat on, also good. The usual of making his breakfast and packing his lunch and laying out his 'getting ready for work stuffs' also good and maybe a tad excessive but it isn't something that I think twice about doing and I think that one of the best things about being in a relationship is being able to take care of the other person ... even if that sounds gooey and mushy I stand by it and wouldn't have it any other way!
The weather has been horrible and despite trying to leave the house to go to the library that is just under 15 minutes of a stroll from our flat I cannot bring myself to get out that front door. It is normally because I cannot face leaving the house in general but the idea of rain water touching me, seeping through my skin and the chemicals in the water in my mind is enough to make me close the door and cry while taking off my shoes - If I even get as far as putting them on.
I badly want to go down to the library and have a look around. I don't know if I can bring myself to touch the books but I am determined to give it a try. Wearing gloves would take it too far and even though I have let my OCD go far enough over the years I think that wearing gloves would bring it to tipping point and it would really ruin any enjoyment out of one of my few and favourite past times. I will try again tomorrow because it will be raining throughout the day today. Yes, I refuse to wear gloves for my OCD but I refuse to leave the house because of rain water. OCD doesn't have to make sense. Either you got it or you don't.